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Sunday, 20 May 2007
Mood:  sad
Life hasnt really been the same ever since i found out about my little girl. My mom treats me like im nothing. Her words can really hurt time to time... But ill always forgive my mother no matter what? At times i regret having this baby, but only because it feels like i cant give her everything in the world. I dropped out of High School my freshman year ever since then its been hard to go back and finish, so my parents just suggested the G.E.D but honestly where is that going to take me in this life? It feels like no where... My whole life i wanted to be a producer, but it doesnt feel like my life will ever reach its goal in life. In my family im known as a low life, i guess they are right i am a low life... I cant seem to finish school, not even my G.E.D... What am i gonna offer my baby girl?

Posted by proudmother2004 at 1:44 AM EDT
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Saturday, 12 May 2007
Its true
Mood:  chillin'
How much I love you my darling love,
I have no idea about this... it really is hard to tell,
Its hard to describe... hard to say,
But I just want you right beside me all the time,
When moon is out I sit under the starry sky eyes closed I pray,

The only thing I shudder of is losing you,
Can't even imagine how world would be without you,
I might not say it quite often my angel,
But, this heart of mine is yours and I love you,

I dream of you as my soulmate as the owner of my soul,
I dream of you as my sweet heart wife,
This life would be nothing without you,
Without you life would be struggle and strife,

I can imagine our wedding my love,
I can picture you and me standing in the candle lit church,
After the sacred holy vows, I give you the bonding kiss,
The gap between my fingers is made for your fingers,
When you take my hand and it perfectly fits,

When you rest your head on my shoulder, oh sweet heart,
I dream a thousand dreams, I leave this world for a while,
I love it when you hug me tightly in your arms,
I love it when you say you are forever mine,

The rise of the morning sun, I see in your eyes,
Your face is home of charms with your serene smile,
You take my heart away without a single word,
You make my heart beat another zillion times,

God is really kind, he is true like his name,
How will I ever thank great lord for what he has done for me,
I am blessed by his eternal care that is your endless love,
You are more than a heavenly angel more than a goddess can ever be...

You're all I ever wanted my babe... my life,
All that I ever dared dream of I have it with me now,
I dream of a world of romance with you,
I dream of me and you taking our wedding vows,

When I am sleepless and lonely,
I sit outside and watch the stars of midnight sky,
When you're not here with me,
Thoughts of you passes through my mind,

The way you move, you fly without wings,
Your words the way you talk they make me hush,
I see everything in your eyes, its crystal clear for me,
Your eyes are as deep as oceans of love,
I just want to love you all my life and there's nothing else I want to do,

I might not say it quite often my life but I am blessed,
Blessed by lord's biggest love, your immense love which is so very true,
All I want to say is that I love you,
I dream of a tomorrow and a lifetime with you...

Posted by proudmother2004 at 4:22 PM EDT
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A room in my heart for you!
Mood:  happy
My heart is a place you can call your home
There is no empty space for you to feel alone
There is a room we can paint colors so bright
The light shining from you will be our light

The door is always open just for you
Not a place for heartbreaks or hearts torn in two
In a room that will never be ice cold
I'll stand by you as the days grow old

Theres a window to let in the light in on bright days
A shining romance that will last always
The lock on the door keeping our love locked
Our love is never rude or inpatient or blocked

Theres a place in my heart, a room you can call home
Somewhere you can rely on and let every emotion shown
There is a room in my heart for memories and fun
There is only room in my heart for my special one

Posted by proudmother2004 at 4:16 PM EDT
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The way i Feel for you
Mood:  happy
Sometimes at night, when I look to the sky,
I start thinking of you and then ask myself, why?
Why do I love you? I think and smile,
because I know the list could run on for miles.
The whisper of your voice, the warmth of your touch,
so many little things that make me love you so much.
The way you support me, and help with my emotions,
the way that you care and show such devotion.
The way that your kiss, fills me with desire,
and how you hold me with the warmth of a blazing fire.
The way your eyes shine when you look at me,
lost with you forever is where I want to be.
The way that I feel when you're by my side,
a sense of completion and overflowing pride.
The dreams that I dream, that all involve you,
the possibilities I see and the things we can do.
How you finish the puzzle that lies inside my heart,
how that deep in my soul, you are the most important part.
I could go on for days, telling of what I feel,
but all you really must know is my love for you is real.

Posted by proudmother2004 at 4:07 PM EDT
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Friday, 11 May 2007
Wat more to say
Mood:  crushed out
My Song

Who knows how long our relationship will actually last this time? I know deep down my heart i wanna spend for ever with her, but look at everything that is happening to us. The arguements have gotten worst and worst, im not that great with making things right, feeling that the end between us would be my fault. I love tori with all my heart and it only takes one time to really show her that everything is alright. I know that one last chance she gave me was the best choice she ever made in her life. This last straw can be strong enough to make things work. At times we say the things we shouldnt, the words that would hurt, but towards the end those words are always true... We dont speak out loud for attention we speak out loud to be heard! From day one i promised her i would be there through it all, the troubles would all be fixed, our love would be perfect... I gave her my heart 100% hoping to die with her's near by! Im trying so hard to be the best i can be, to a point where i lost her trust my heart is trying so hard to re-gain strenght for our love to grow more and more. This girl is going to give me all the love i can get, cant wait to marry her, keep her close by my heart... But are we really gonna get that far? There has been a wall build for me, her emotions are closed to me, not knowing wat to expect from her! All i have ever asked from her, is to give me the strenght, to open up to me, give me what every other relationship wants? (Dignit)Till later!

Posted by proudmother2004 at 6:48 PM EDT
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